Your Kids Are Watching

Research shows that children start feeling pressure from peers to experiment with drinking alcohol around ages 9-13, but as a parent, with your guidance, your child can learn to make the right decision. Some suggestions as to how you can help protect your child:

1. Be a good role model. Your actions as a parent speak just as loudly as talking to your child about alcohol and drug use. Parents who set a good example through their social habits have kids who do better in the areas of school, employment, relationships, coping and other life skills.
2. Ask other family members or friends to serve as positive role models for your child.
3. If you drink, never drink to the point of being intoxicated. Parents’ abuse of alcohol or other drugs significantly increases a child’s chances of using, using early and developing a substance abuse problem.
4. Have family dinners and parties without serving alcohol to show your child that it’s not necessary to consume alcohol in order to have fun.
5. Never drink and drive.
6. Never send the message that alcohol or other drugs are to be used to reduce stress or solve problems.
7. If you have a problem with alcohol or other drug use, get help.
8. Obey all laws. Know the laws about underage drinking in your state. It’s illegal for minors (those under age 21) to possess alcohol and it’s also illegal for an adult to supply alcohol to a minor.
9. Talk to your child about the dangers of underage drinking. Explain that drinking alcohol may affect learning due to young bodies and brains still developing.
10. Set clear rules for your child about alcohol and other drugs. Be firm about the consequences if rules are broken.

You Could Lose Me to Drugs or Alcohol

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Don’t think it won’t happen to your child. Youth who are involved in drugs are reporting that they start with tobacco and alcohol and elementary and middle school. Prevention should start with parents. Don’t assume they know your beliefs and values about not using drugs.

The good news is that parents have a major influence in their child’s life. According to the Office of National Drug Control Policy, research has shown that two-thirds of teens say that losing their parents’ respect and pride is one of the main reason they don’t use drugs. You matter and can make a difference. Some suggestions we have are:

1. Plan “together time.” This does not need to be something that costs money. Your time is more valuable. Watching “their” TV shows will give opportunities. Playing “their” video games is another idea. How about their music? There are websites where you can find the lyrics to their music.
2. Eat meals together. Research shows that eating at least 5 meals together a week as a family decreases the risk of your child engaging in risk behaviors. These do not need to “fancy” meals. It is the time that is important.
3. Listen. Ask questions and be willing to hear the answers.
4. Talk. Do this often and when there is not a crisis. Times like driving in the car, taking a walk. Look for the times to talk and make it happen.
5. Look for the teachable moments. For example, we cannot shelter them from all the media influences, but we can help them navigate them.
6. Use open questions/statements. Some: “What do you think?’ “That’s a good question.” “Help me understand.”
7. Give honest answers. If you don’t know the answers, tell them you will find out.
8. Role play with your child. This may be one of the most important things you can do. If they are prepared to handle a situation before it happens, the better they will be able to avoid drugs.
9. Be clear about your values. Again, don’t assume they know how disappointed you would be if they used drugs, tell them.
10. Set limits. This is better to do early on. Don’t wait until a problem happens.